Not Quite Science

Snow days

2012-01-18T00:48:00.000-08:00

2012-01-16T21:21:00.000-08:00

I'm kind of worried about the future.

2012-01-04T20:15:00.000-08:00

I like the idea of wierd alien island kids hatching from spotted eggs haha

Bought a brush pen

2012-01-04T20:11:00.000-08:00

2011-12-27T01:27:00.000-08:00

Quick doodles of girls

2011-12-20T22:11:00.000-08:00

A small piece of a very strange photoshop file I just found on my computer.

2011-12-18T20:49:00.000-08:00

2011-12-18T20:47:00.001-08:00

Get off my lawn!

2011-12-14T00:34:00.000-08:00

What happens when a starved girl opens photoshop for the first time in three months.

haha ok, a little better.

Companion

2011-12-07T17:02:00.000-08:00

The final for my introduction to surface class. And late last night when I was finishing the sculpture this song popped up on my itunes:

Which fit somehow really well.

Bleaching

2011-12-05T12:21:00.000-08:00

Playing around with bleaching materials and layered mark making.

Double Indemnity

2011-12-05T12:19:00.001-08:00

2011-11-26T19:44:00.000-08:00

Party Animals.

Materials Study: Embroidery

2011-11-21T23:04:00.000-08:00

Wish that instead of white, a more intermediary color had been used but alas, just wasn't thinking that far ahead.

   An introductory project to embroidery. I've never done embroidery before even though for literally years, I've been watching it with interest. The process is really fun, frustrating and in the end gratifying, but the sexist attitude toward sewing and craft is a bit disheartening. Totally too tired for a rant right now but no worries, I will post one in the near future haha. Anyway, before starting I was looking at Jillian Tamaki's embroideries and how she's been using them in her professional practice. Her work is really inspiring and it's dissappointing that I didn't become aware of her before I left New York because how she takes on drawing in her work seems very uncompramising which results in images that are so alive!

   From this experiment we're moving into finals, and for this class I'm definitely going to expand what I learned into a true reworking of a surface. Have been thinking about modifying a piece of clothing with almost journal like vignettes. Almost like a visual free-write that may explore childhood and race relation? Or a kid's relationship with the media? It would tie in with my glass final quite nicely...

Near Sandpoint

2011-11-19T22:36:00.000-08:00

Today got lost on the way to my destination and found this abandoned building that had been condemned because of abestos. It's owned by the University of Washington but is part of a larger collection of infrastructure that was once an old military base. It felt strange walking around and exploring (hah, probably because of the no trespassing signs) but there were just these really great details, like water decay, boarded up windows and the lines of very out of place looking windows that lined the top. But then when I went to peek inside I thought of all the people who may be hiding inside or worse, all the empty stairwells that lead up to those windows that were perfect for watching. Needless to say I got kinda spooked and went on my merry way. Then when I turned the corner there were all these men with metal detectors sweeping the lawn. How wierd is that!?

highway birds

2011-11-19T21:48:00.000-08:00

Here is a small materials study assignment with applying heat binding pigment to fabric. After all the dyeing and slow building up of layered transparent color, it was nice to just draw and create a more graphic and deliberate mark. The pigment wasn't diluted and I just worked on the muslin with a brush to see how things went. I like to draw! No matter how open I am and intrigued I am with all the avenues that an artist can now take everything returns to drawing. It's definitely something I want to keep developing despite UWs insistance on heavy theory and clumsy hands.

Every once in awhile it feels like I have to put my boxing gloves on and get in the ring to defend my stance on background and the environment of my work. Though I'm very interested in an environment texturally and creating a space for my subject of choice to exist in, complete articulation of the world outside my focus just to create a context feels wrong. When I focus, I can't see anything outside of what I'm looking at, and if drawing is an act of focusing, well that just means that my drawings arn't handicapped at all, but just honest. They are able to serve the dual purpose of communicating ideas for a greater cultural need (Illustration, entertainment, public consumption, livelihood) as well as create a place where I can work out the more personal aspects (neurosis, fetish, innocent curiosity) that come with being an artist... Or at least that's the balance I'm working toward :)

My cat, Mischa, didn't get to come live with me in Seattle, and I miss her a lot. Can you tell??

2011-11-13T21:12:00.000-08:00

what do you want to draw? Idk. boobs.

laterne

2011-11-08T23:12:00.000-08:00

Coloring with kids today.

Direct Dye

2011-11-08T23:10:00.001-08:00

2011-10-26T19:11:00.000-07:00

Bleached

2011-10-26T19:09:00.000-07:00

2011-10-22T15:37:00.001-07:00

Shibori 1

2011-10-22T15:35:00.000-07:00

oh, and this.

2011-10-07T17:18:00.000-07:00

Can you spot my cat and I? (hint: I'm not wearing glasses.)

I've been thinking a lot about a film-noir crime drama involving bugs...

Really strong coffee, cinnamon roll, bargs root beer.

2011-10-07T17:12:00.000-07:00

I've just started my Senior year at the University of Washington and am kicking it off with a fabric embelishing class and introduction to glass. Towards the end of the summer I didn't know where to go with my art and was frustrated with my limitations with drawing and painting, actually discarding my pencil instead to write a little bit of fiction and poetry... For now I want to instead of drawing figures and elements that look like singular objects on a picture plane actually create objects that take power over their surroundings, or become part of whatever environment they're thrust into. Not that I won't return to drawing and digital media, but I'm excited to try a different way of approaching what I want to communicate or give people when they experience the art.

There's a certain quality of light here, especially during fall that lines even the most dilapitated work spaces with gold. ALSO, love the structure of the naked clothing rack.

Learning how to mix dyes and use them on fabric. Here are our first swatches after they've been ironed out and proudly displayed. The entire experience of washing and treating the fabric was a lot like Christmas. That's one of my dyeing buddies, Monica. She was laying stuff out but retreated when I tried to take a picture. So obviously I made her look busy again haha thus her goofy smile. (Note: See that cobalt blue piece? yeah, I mixed that dye :)

Learning how to use kilns with glass and our first assignment is to slump glass into a wire/ metal frame. I'm hoping that the open bottom part will warp into a sagging cavity linked with tubing. Intention wise the goal is that it will be read as an ambiguous biological structure like a stomach, uterus etc. and that the glass will become liquidy enough to fuse into all the grooves and crevices of the tangled wiring, picking up that complicated woven/ veiny pattern. The other way this could go is that it will actually capture the metal frame within the glass. A possibility I'm very ready to work with! Am a little worried about the weak outcrop but maybe it will be saved after some reinforcement when it's fired.

I think my problem has been that I pick a nonexistant place I want to be (ex. success) and then make these lists of criteria that I think will get me there, which just immobilizes me in fear of moving or doing the wrong thing. When really I should just work as hard as possible without a specific idea of the future and see how far I get on my own terms and ready myself for opportunity. This direction seems really exciting to me.

Different takes on a self portrait

2011-09-18T23:06:00.000-07:00

Moved

2011-09-15T21:34:00.001-07:00

Another

2011-09-11T13:49:00.000-07:00

Pete Campbell from Mad Men.

I, I and I.

2011-09-11T00:30:00.001-07:00

Sometimes it's difficult to muster the energy to deal with people. Sometimes I'm happiest when alone. And sometimes making art and writing seem to be the only ways I can participate in life or communicate that I exist. It's also scary to think that there's a risk that one day I may reject people all together because of this social weakness. Letting that happen is not an option though. It would truthfully be the end of me. Nobody wants to end up like Ayn Rand.

2011-09-10T11:32:00.000-07:00

His ear looks like a piece of uncooked steak! <3

Trying out acrylics by painting Donald Draper from Mad Men.

It's nice how quickly acrylics dry for when you want to just build something up and not smear away the texture. Also it allows your hand to move as if you're drawing... I really really like what happened with this portrait but am unsure if It can happen again. It was made out of panic once the paint started drying and a childish declaration of "Little Miss, You will not leave this table until you've finished your painting!" We will see, I'll try a few more portraits or scenes and see how it goes.

first

2011-09-05T23:31:00.000-07:00

Lola Lola my Lolita.

2011-09-05T22:17:00.000-07:00

For this weeks theme for Get Better, or Die we had to design a bookcover of our choice. I chose Lolita because I don't agree with the popular visual interpretations of the book in Cinema and illustration alike. Often Lolita is depicted as this saucy woman-child, who lays about conciously torturing the main character Humbert (courtesy of Hollywood) when the cold reality of the book is that she's a little girl who's repeatedly raped by a deranged child molester. There's something rather disturbing culturally when readers don't want to let go of Humbert Humbert's dillusion of the underdeveloped seductress. This kind of thinking is covert and reinforces certain ideas that the victims of sexual assault are really at fault for what has happened to them.

The copy I own has a review by vogue (I'm going to have to check this) that has the audacity to say that Lolita is the most truthful love story of our time. What? Last time I checked love is not built on fetish, which locks one into a state of mind that requires stasis of the object of affection. The original idea was one of cleanliness: Lolita's name colored, light, and Nabokov, as the only male presence, somehow depicted more sinister, a place holder for humbert, possibly with a shadow crossing it. Instead I decided just to cast the entire thing in shadows. Taking away the fantasy that this is a romance novel and instead somehow, if only conceptually, speak to the transient nature of Humbert's sought after nymphettes, the bleakness in knowing that he can't ever love a person in their totality, as well as having the cover act as a portrait of Lolita's life after Humbert.

A single artist working is more of a generational window, less so because of their actual talent and more so the reasons they've been elevated to unprecedented ranks by their surrounding culture. Why are they singularily so valuable? The fine artist changes the art world and gives history a cultural context.

As a whole, I believe in freedom of expression. In illustration though the game undeniably changes. The responsibility is no longer on being a conduit of culture, or personal indulgence of desires so much as being aware of the visual culture you're helping to shape and taking responsibility for what you're putting out into the world. AND who's view points (if not yours) you're helping propell forward. It's one of the reasons I go back and forth on if I want to be an illustrator once I graduate. It's a lot of responsibility!

2011-09-05T11:23:00.001-07:00

Inks

2011-08-28T20:22:00.000-07:00

Decided to play around with some old drawings that were left over and floating around my room by inking over them.

Two different takes on a funeral after party.

And this guy, with a plant and a pervy mouth. Obviously.

Hiking and Pit Stop

2011-08-28T15:46:00.000-07:00

Rant brought to you by disgustingly talented 15 year olds.

2011-08-26T23:30:00.000-07:00

For the "Saying Goodbye" theme on www.getbetterordie.tumblr.com

This was originally a really expansive image, about funerals and lots of people, and small scenes happening in big scenes, and well it just didn't work so it just kept getting cropped cropped cropped. And the drawing of the girl is waaay too stiff. Blerp, don't like it, but that's okay. I've been told you have to make a lot of crap before you do anything right. Maybe I'll move away from photoshop for awhile.

Actually i was thinking about illustration, and whats fashionable right now. I really love german children books from the 50s- 70s, and even now really. They tend to be really loose drawing, or simplistic shapes, and instead of one focus there's a lot of joy in creating images that have many interlocking social interactions happening in a tiny space. For example if it's a fairy tale, you'll have the main scene with the prince and princess swooning in the grass, and then you'll notice some owls in the trees peeping at them, and then when you're about to turn the page you realize there's a lawn gnome sunbathing by a puddle of water and some lady bugs having a property dispute.

Example of German Story book illustration. Also, This is a pretty accurate description of my home.

I don't like how insecure I've become with my art, or at least how it reached this pinnacle of paranoia about not being good enough, tight enough, talented enough, egotistical enough. It's actually one of the reasons I left SVA, because for some reason folks disregarded what I held as important (character, complexity, scatter brained etc.) and instead were trying with all their might to create another one of their slick drones, clean edges, worthy of awards given out by stuffy old men running obsolete museums. Now I wish I could have stood up a little stronger, been a little more of a butt-head and told folks to shove off. Because now I have all these sicko art school rules bouncing around my head and they're making me bonkers, because they make no sense and at not point have they helped me create better art.

The point of all this is that I just want to leave all that bitterness behind, put it in the past and make this last year in school really count.

And that is why I don't like my illustration for GetBetterOrDie.

maids

2011-08-23T18:15:00.000-07:00

A few failed coloring attempts on these mermaid sketches

oh well.

Villainess Numero uno.

2011-08-21T19:24:00.000-07:00

Hey kids!
I've been re-watching the first season of Sailor Moon and have been drawing a lot of villain ladies with obnoxiously large shoulder pads. I'll save my gushing over my current cartoon obsessions for a later post, but expect a lot more character designs, and practice shots, and photoshop practice and you know FUN STUFF. Who would have thought that a few goofy animated shows would make me so happy haha

I think coloring my character doodles will help with my inability to use color accurately. My goal is to be able to pick a color without having to fancy the image up with levels adjustment, as well as minimal and calculated shadow placement :) Not that complicated coloring is bad, but just for practical and professional environments I want to be able to know I can execute something even if I don't have much time.

Couch stuff

2011-08-16T19:19:00.000-07:00

Painting Update part 2:

2011-08-15T22:30:00.000-07:00

Experiments in abstraction and implied narration.

While contemplating voyeurism, motion, porn

And the mythical hotel room.

Painting Update part 1:

2011-08-15T22:13:00.000-07:00

My painting is going in an odd direction, as you'lle likely make note of in the posts to come. This is where I started, imagery I'm comfortable with, but built on a surface that was more about how the materials reacted to gravity and light. As well as questioning why I was making a specific move within the painting instead of placing colors and visual information just because it would make the painting look more professional or identifiable as "art".

There's even a pocket of excitement in creating something that can't be fully understood through photographs, prints and distributed like a virus through the internet, something that's become an obsession in the art world. Everythings, digital video, viewer controlled, computer generated, quick, 4g, social network overloaded and immediately disposable once the new status update is made. Digital work is becoming increasingly important for me but sometimes I get all paranoid that the digital images don't count or exist with the same integrity. It's so elitist but I can't help it! haha :) Talk about artistic self loathing and split morals!

There's nothing like ranting about technology on your blog and uploading photos of your "real" paintings via picture phone heh

Clocks

2011-08-14T22:47:00.000-07:00

Practice Practice Practice

2011-07-30T13:47:00.000-07:00

Hello Everyone! Sorry for the long verbal Haitus. I got back from visiting friends in New York almost a week ago and have been kind of busy trying to figure out work stuff, where I'm going to live this coming school year and all that jazz. Anyway, above is something done for this weekly illustration challenge I'm hopefully starting with a friend, this week's theme was Pin ups/ sexy. Chances are we won't stick to our guns, but who knows. Once we make the blog, I'll post it here so you can see his work to.

For this project I wanted to practice working in Photoshop and transferring drawings unscathed into the computer to be colored. I tend to really like my drawings but then when it comes to inking, or cleaning them for coloring on the computer the life just get's stripped away. While in the process I discovered the miraculous invention of tracing paper (Halleluja!) which made things so much easier.

The Image is weak on a lot of levels, but definitely a step in the right direction... I think. At this point, any step is the right direction, as long as it's not here haha.

2011-07-20T20:43:00.000-07:00

2011-07-20T10:29:00.000-07:00

What. We. Do. For. Love.

2011-07-18T14:48:00.000-07:00

2011-07-13T12:37:00.001-07:00

2011-07-13T12:35:00.001-07:00

2011-07-10T09:48:00.001-07:00

Playing with dolls

2011-07-05T22:58:00.000-07:00

A trade, or a truce?

2011-06-30T17:29:00.000-07:00

A Slit Face.

2011-06-26T20:53:00.001-07:00

Oh yeah

2011-06-26T13:24:00.000-07:00

Look, we're the same!!

Just started this painting. I'ts really awkward. Compositionally it was ill planned, the drawing was neglected and really, the end result is up in the air. Even so... it's just so wierd that I can't give up on it! What will it become!? I've been building the surface of the painting little by little the past few months, So putting this down and working on something until the next step seems apparent won't be difficult :)

2011-06-26T13:01:00.000-07:00

Pages

2011-06-21T20:24:00.000-07:00

I tend to frankenstein things together in photoshop for work so there's always unclean process residue when I initially draw all the little pieces. These were just interesting because they were done on the same piece of paper, so when scanned you can see it's neighbor faintly.

Was watching Crimes and Misdemeanors (Woody Alan)

I'm a very indescisive person so everyone I draw tends to have numerous possible leg orientations and erase marks. Here it looks like she's just stopped tap-dancing.

Fun unintentional things.

That's so...raven.

2011-06-17T14:34:00.000-07:00

Random picture done for a work assignment. He came out a little lopsided, but since it's only meant to be maybe an inch big in the image I figure it will be alright. On a side note, he may have the largest forhead of anyone I've ever seen... and thats coming from someone who knows big forheads!

It's one of those really great days, where you get up early and everything is working properly. My cubicle is by a window that lets in the morning light, so I got to work in the sunshine, listen to Beyonce and draw Edgar Allan Poe, which was very fulfilling. I was thinking of redrawing him with his hair made of beedy eyed ravens, buut there's already so many pictures of Poe hanging out with Ravens that it seemed a little bit redundant.

Side Tangent: Am sitting waiting for my Friend Laura Knetzger to get here so we can drop her new awesome Bug Boy Zines, off at the local comic shops. You should buy a million copies and spread the word (Yeah, that means you anonymous few who actually read this blog!)

Summer warm up

2011-06-16T23:34:00.000-07:00

This little boy and the dog plant were supposed to end up in the same image together.

but they became such different entities

that I had to place them in their own space.

I'm too dreamy tonight to write anything substantial, but here's a list of things that have been on my mind lately to hold you over till the next post:

1) transparency

2) Repetition

3) The Physiology of nerve endings

4) Graffiti

5) Freud

6) Self-tanning lotion

2011-06-06T21:15:00.000-07:00

Work Update

2011-05-26T20:27:00.000-07:00

This ones my favorite. But makes absolutely no sense!

Some more recent images for work meant as learning aids for a class project about Virus transmission and vaccine development. Only a week and a half left of school and then it's summer, which means back to working on my own art again! Which is good, because right now I feel like I'm going to burst if I don't get some ideas out. I havn't even sketched in like two weeks!

Mr. Garbage. Hands.

2011-05-13T16:03:00.000-07:00

Thinking a lot about what it means to vandalize your own work and how that relates to changing the past through remembering, or if it even relates at all.

What I keep.

2011-05-08T18:00:00.000-07:00

Hey!

Am reflecting on how I naturally arrange objects in my personal space (with the exception of the cat). Sometimes I look to my things to remind me who I am and where I came from.

Once upon a time I used to collect absolutely everything, and I mean everything. Everyday I'd find different things on the street, hub caps, stand alone frying pans, small pornographic photos and fill my pockets with the left over starburst wrappers that came in so many pretty colors. Which meant my room was this claustraphobic shrine. The objects took over and often I'd find myself sleeping between piles of things, unwilling to move them because they were asthetically pleasing. Like there was a big god like camera watching from the outside. Was very much the same with my wardrobe. I'd sometimes buy things just because I liked the fabric and hang them up, never really bothering to wear them.

This isn't so much the case anymore, because eventually I couldn't stand it anymore, and the great purge commenced. To most this wouldn't seem as such a huge life event, but it was definitely a turning point.

So this is what I do for Money.

2011-05-02T11:04:00.001-07:00

"Gimme that sensor!"

"Oh Heeyy do we wanna deal with graphs or people?"

Look at this goofy plant cell poster I made.

Fun fact: I modeled the fellow on the bottom after my Grandpa. What a nerd! I love him though, he's a retired engineer and was working with computers back when they were giant black boxes that filled entire rooms.

So, I'm working for a company/ pile of grad students that are developing a new high school science curriculum and it's my job to make pretty pictures for their presentations and in-class demos. Not so sure how long my job is supposed to last, but it's a great opportunity and is actually getting kind of fun (le gasp!). It's wierd to think that these will be the images that the most people see. And when I say people what I really mean is BILL GATES! haha but no, really. So rad, so scary and I wish they were so much better. But I have to hold back, because these arn't meant to be magical, or egotistical on my part, or be groundbreaking art. They are tools, and thats something that is kind of hard, because all i want is romance and icecream and AAAaaarrrrtt haha but I get vacuoles. It's cool, life structures are amazing.

2011-04-27T22:44:00.000-07:00

Rhinos and pickles.

2011-04-27T00:00:00.000-07:00

I'ts never about the Rhino.

Hmm, I don't know how to lead into this, but I've been looking at a lot of photography of Tribes in Africa for the totally shallow reason that they're stylin? They're pretty? But all those examples of colorful body painting, woven textiles and interesting body modification are in these books that are surprisingly old-school about how they portray people. In that they portray the people of africa not as people but as animals or a "species" that can become endangered. It's really wierd but like they'll have a picture of these kids "stampeding" or of a girl grinning wide with a camel behind her, and because she has a gap between her teeth and the camel has a gap between it's teeth they are suddenly the same thing? They don't have sex they "mate" etc. etc.

It happens elsewhere too, obvious example: The Lion King and that new movie coming out, AFRICAN CATS! Africa doesn't have people, only singing lions haha

I mean, I can't talk. My sketchbook is full of blackface babies and fictional tribe people. The more I learn about all this kind of negative imagery the more I want to incorporate it into my work, just because it's sometimes so seductive in how it ungulates between benign and scarring.

Plus it makes me feel naughty, there is that.

Gettin messy, takin names

2011-04-24T22:01:00.000-07:00

Apparenly I like drawing people touching their faces. Now that I think about it I touch my face a lot.

Notice tumblr avatar in upper left hand image, saame. Also the same as that one king print from awhile back. Fixated, only want to draw gnarly hands and squished faces.

Also I've decided to stop being such a neurotic pussy and just MAKE THE GODDANG ART. If that means I have to be a slob, then dang-nabbit I'll be the best slob you ever did see.

OH YOU FANCY HUH?

Oh, and I bought these pants and am a little over excited about them.

The American Apparel pose comes free with purchase.

Now that I have the fancy tumblr, It seems okay to share with you more trivial things. BUT DANG, look at how glorious these are! They are definately a work of art worth admiring.

Whoa.

2011-04-21T14:33:00.000-07:00

Breakthrough! (And wow, low cut top lol)

HOLY MOTHER OF GOD MY BRAIN JUST EXPLODED! I know what I want to do after undergrad! I know what I want to study, I KNOW OMG I KNOW! So in practice I'm an illustrator and obsessed with images but have trouble sticking to the ideologies of print arts and more modern conceptualizing thats so in vogue and know that I'd be totally discontent just blindly following one art practice, because I'm on the fence about illustration as a boxed artform and the formlessness of contemperary art. Whenever someone tries to force an artistic truth It's hard not to see the holes in it, the self congratulatory tone of art critiqe and the necessary exclusion of people that's necessary to artifically produce an art economy. This art lecture course has really opened my eyes to how art now belongs to those who are able to argue their ideas the best and overpower the less articulate. Which means more talk, less art. Aka (derp!) politics? WHAA?!

Containing excitement.

It's basic powerplays. Idk, oh my god, I don't want to be stuck in that swamp, I want to study it. How do images change us, how has it been used historically to control people as a whole, how it's being used now, how it shapes racial/ sexual/ collective identity etc. etc.

This is hella rambly, and makes no sense, but for some reason I feel like I've hit something important, something that I've kept overlooking.

Visual Artist by day, Vigilante Art Historian by Night! Huzzah!! (Or maybe the other way around haha)

Done and back to work!

Possible program?

Reinventing the wheel.

2011-04-19T10:00:00.000-07:00

Look what change in medium did! (above)

Bought a sketchbook and am practicing. Because that's what I need, practice, not just technically but practice being able to pick out what I like about how I work, what imagery I'm comfortable with and just getting over the fear of making something ugly. Basically am practicing BEING PRODUCTIVE. Also it's important that I just get more focused and precise for work.

It's very wierd, actually, what you can discover and feel when you're drawing. For me I've noticed that there's different gears I fall into, theres slow and layered, there's the sort of practiced cartoony and then theres the richocheting around where the drawings are about to shake apart. The goal is to eventually be able to start utilizing how I draw in finished pieces, especially the shaky bit and let go of the idea that my work, illustration or otherwise is ever going to fit in anywhere.

Thanks for listening guys, fun stuff coming up, I'm making a Spring mixtape!

Tanned

2011-04-15T22:24:00.000-07:00

Just Playing.

Francine.

2011-03-27T22:42:00.000-07:00

We all feel like monsters sometimes!

One of those times you're like "oh man, so original!" and then you realize you probably stole it from this guy:

Hahaha oh well, Nick Cave is a genius, so no biggie. When people aren't wearing his soundsuits they have this presence in the gallery. A few days ago i met a friend for lunch and we were talking about the power objects get when they've been handled and used by people. It's definitely a strange idea, but makes so much natural sense. The more something is loved, or hated, or passively woven into our everyday life the more it changes and becomes something we later cherish. Maybe not necessarily always a power that exists because people do but then that goes into that whole "if a tree falls in the forest does it make a sound" concept.

Anyway, Francine was actually one monster out of many. If I can find the original magic marker sketches I'll do them too and montage them into an epic birthday scene! But really, they may be lost to the abyss that is my bookshelf. You see, I tend to shove notes, checks and other important documents in between my books and under objects to keep them safe...and then lose them.

Tomorrow is back to school and back to work. A bittersweet goodbye to Spring break. I gotta get my learn on :)

2011-03-22T22:03:00.000-07:00

Turn Away Woman (Linolium Blockprint)

Woodcut

Busy Home

2011-03-22T20:23:00.000-07:00

Linolium Block Print

Waayyy too busy, but am still fond of it. All I heard during the critique was "Oh my god just like van gogh!". Dear class, I don't think Van Gogh has dibs on stylized wood grain. Just sayin!

Monoprint Final

2011-03-22T19:59:00.000-07:00

Original Plate plus some tone/ textures

Intro to Intaglio and Drypoint

2011-03-22T19:54:00.001-07:00

Original Plate printed in Black.

Lead up to final Monoprint Projects

2011-03-22T19:49:00.000-07:00

Slimy Sweaty Embrace

We are not

2011-03-22T18:22:00.000-07:00

An oil painting that got rejected from the UW juried competition. Now I don't feel so bad, since the fellow who chose the pieces didn't like representational work or vibrantly colored pieces or photography but I can see why it didn't get in. Both paintings I submitted look amazing in the proper light, but up close there are places where the painting is thin and dirty. But why would that be a problem? A pile of dirt got into the show lol (No really, a pile of dirt made it).

Right now am sort of walking into some imagery that I can't quite explain. Am feeling very drawn to this imaginary biological interior, veiny, pulsating and there are people, but they're more like vessels for one distinct state of being. Slightly fetishy and exploitational. Am planning another larger painting that deals with similar themes but am going to try and address some problems such as contrast, and my fear of more lively brushstrokes.

But fear not my small group of loyal readers goofy watercolor monsters are on the distant horizon!

2011-03-21T22:55:00.000-07:00

A+!

1. Lots of Dead stuff

2011-03-21T22:14:00.000-07:00

Ok, so what the hell is that in the bottom left? Like an alien termite or something!! Also, notice the Lord of the flies pig head, it is my favorite.

Googly contour drawings are very fun to do.

Back to reality!

2011-03-21T22:08:00.000-07:00

Phew! Just returned from collecting and cleaning out my drawers/ lockers from the last quarter so will slowly be scanning and documenting it all, so check back over the next few days for new stuff :). Originally was most excited over the larger projects but had forgotten all the wierd drawings that had been collecting at the bottom of the pile. Some of which I'm sure, when added to certain behaviours probably painted me in a very, lets say, unbalanced light hahaha.

Guuhh I really have to get a sketchbook since next quarter I'll be responsible for myself, no studio classes, just two science classes and an artist lecture seminar. Poo.

2011-03-13T22:50:00.000-07:00

There have been a lot of deadlines lately. Last week I was somewhat on top of it, and then everything compounded onto this weekend and I totally shut down. Artistically I feel really fractured, and am not so sure anymore if I'm really cut out for illustration. Am working for a UW company but feel like I'm letting them down. How can I explain to them that I'm not a machine? I can write a twelve page paper in one night, but can't seem to draw or color under the same constraints ( as can be seen below). And feel sick to my stomach when I have to compromise quality.

On a differing topic, does anybody have thoughts/ opinions on antidepressants?

Don't worry guys, one week until spring break and I can show you all the cool things I've made :)

2011-03-11T16:35:00.000-08:00

Final Critiques.

Don't Panic.

Well said.

2011-02-01T12:03:00.000-08:00

"Soo uhh, I'm interested in illustration and uuuuhh children's illustration and uuuuuummm horror and stuff."

And sex, you forgot the sex part.

Hip-ley's Believe it or not!

2011-01-25T22:56:00.000-08:00

Today was very frustrating to say the least. My shoes hurt my feet, I ruined my favorite shirt by splashing oil based ink on it, missed a bus, and spent six hours on printing and have nothing to show for it even though the drawing lovely. So to try and turn the day around I did a digital mock up that slightly resembles what I had in mind when I stepped into the studio most optimistically. This project was meant to be fun!! I really have to fight the urge to combine my school work with my "professional" or illustration practice. These classes are skill classes and they should go better as long as I focus only on learning the techniques, not the end product. How can a ruined piece of paper create such emotional crisis?!

Though I wish monoprinting was coming a little easier to me, my digital art work sometimes takes on a lot of the characteristics of an original print. Often I merge all the layers to prevent myself from going back after a few different versions have been made. Which is similar to "striking" a plate once an edition is done. That way the complete freedom of the computer program can be utilized but then made special by willingly closing the chapter on that image. One could even go further and completely delete the original file but that seems a bit rash, at least for a clutter-bug like me.

Barrier Boy

2011-01-15T20:39:00.000-08:00

Finish of that painting I posted progress on awhile back. I now understand why some painters never take photos of their work, it totally changes it! Like in this painting the crystal bits change when you move and actually photographing something shiny without making it just come out as a giant white blotch is near impossible. Plus all the colors were dimmed and look muddy :(. Any tips on how to photograph a painting? Am a bit frustrated by how sloppy it became, but overall this here lonely scandinavian boy feels like a giant step in the right direction.

L'update: Birthday and School

2011-01-15T17:03:00.000-08:00

Birthday pictures by Salena.

I just had my birthday last week and though I was turning 21 I somehow threw a shindig that closely resembled that of the basement scene in 13 Going on Thirty haha. The intent was to host a ghetto Tea Party for bastards where we dressed fancy and drank a noxoius pink concoction of booze and lemonade. Instead wierd cliques formed and old grudges were held tightly too and beyond the first three friends who came nobody even dressed up or seemed to help make it fun. When I offered people "tea" in my mother's assortment of beautiful cups she lent me all I recieved in return were judging stares as if they were humoring a small child or worse, there was some mutant fetus growing out of my forehead. When conversation lulled all eyes turned to me, as if I were supposed to put on a show, tap dance for them, who knows! The party was never meant to be extravagant but who would have thought that within a group of friends I'd still feel like a freak.

There were some moments that were nice though, the panic at gettind dressed with my friends Candie and Salena, where because I had modified my dress with safety pins Salena had to rescue me from its clutches. Playing with balloons, Pretty in Pink playing while showering, falling asleep to Breakfast at Tiffany's, hanging hello kitty streamers, frosting cupcakes and sneaking tastes. There were so many tiny happenings that made it all worth while and I'm thankful to the friends who did come through for me.

Seattle has hit its long grey faze but I'm seeking solace in bright colored textiles, cups of peppermint mochas and super novas. University life is truly lovely and for the first time in a long time I'm content. Everyday I'm surrounded by beautiful architecture and the buzz of thousands of students humming with knowledge. It's a tiny utopia fo sho.

This new quarter brings hours upon hours in the printing studios with breaks in between attending astronomy lectures. Am really digging the printing teachers and curriculum because they ask us to draw a lot and basically work in whatever direction we want. For the last week of drawings I started doing quick ink portraits which came out lovely. Theres a fluidity in brush and ink that really aids in understanding shapes. I just have to be careful to continue to hold myself to a higher standard in my classes. It would be a shame to fall behind my illustration peers just because I switched to a state school.

My schedule feels odd though. Mornings are spend realizing how tiny and insignificant we are in the universe and then within 10 minutes the focus switches to how important even the smallest marks on an 8 by 10 linolium block can be. Isn't life goofy?

protection

2011-01-04T00:34:00.000-08:00

Where have all the illustrators gone?

2010-12-23T22:45:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I dragged a friend along for some Christmas shopping and we wandered into the Children's book section of Barnes and Nobles. And amid all the fancy schmancy illustration with their photoshopped elephants and christmas robots was Madeline. Though I can't remember my mom actually reading it to me, I know that I often read it on my own, or probably more accurately looked at the pictures while naively wishing I were also an orphan :)

There was something captivating about the orphanage depicted in this simple children's story, and it was definitely to the illustrator's credit. It's just seems so effortlessly beautiful. This is someone who is clearly skilled, its obvious in every picture, sometimes in the allignment of the orphan's beds, or the movement of one of the characters tilted forward in a suggested paniced run. How do you draw panic in less than five lines?!? Or, and here I wish I had a picture to show you guys, but in one image the skyline of buildings is only an outline that tapers off into nothing. My breath literally caught when I saw those buildings disapear. They are just perfect I want to cry!

And it's easy to say that the past was awsome and now nobody can do anything right when it comes to art, but damn, these illustrations with their gimpy little trees and tilted parisien land marks have something nobody has deemed important enough to teach but would outshine a million James Jeans.

Yeah, I said it. Now put that in your pipe and smoke it!

The Head map (1)

2010-12-14T19:47:00.000-08:00

"The Birds!"

2010-12-14T00:39:00.000-08:00

Bird Dramas

Initially meant to be a series of politically oriented illustrations of women and birds. I've been trying to learn how to use acrylics (so frustrating!) and am slowly getting the hang of it. But its so different and I think it effected how I create images. After I was done with the above I was like "Whoa, who made that? I didn't make that!" Even though it still has my signiature corner fetish composition going on and hooded figures it just felt so...stable? It looks so dense and heavy. Like a chunk of cement.

homecoming (acrylic)

Which means I made the next bird image in total retaliation haha. Where in the first one I was somber and closed in, here it became suddenly windy and moving fanciful even. I decided to follow the graphic pattern motif that tentatively started in the first, the only stylistic quality that links the two. This time though it was almost too airy and the colors too bright! This illustration reminds me of some of the old sketchers shoe ads from the 90s :)

Help Yourself (Acrylic, India Ink, watercolor, Photoshop)

Should I talk about the messages behind them? I used to write such full blown explanations and now, the more time I spend with an image the more it opens up until all I see is open roads ahead when it comes to what they could "mean". Well though they've morphed during the process and have severed ties completely with each other for the sake of mastering a medium the thumbnail sketches depicted sort of a trifecta of woman at home during war. Since they would have all been swarthed in flowing burqua like clothing people could have read it as a commentary on whats been happening in the middle east, but really they could have been any woman.

Interestingly when I look back I had no interest in depicting the woman warrior. In the scribbles there are only girls being left behind to put back together whats left of civilized society and to watch the fires from afar. They're quiet and reflecting inward on their priveleged safety. Thats what the last image was supposed to be, the one watching from a distance, grateful but ashamed at the same time. Basically carrying on the proud tradition of romanticizing tragedy for the sake of entertainment hehe Maybe I'll go there in the future.

But until then, two final papers having to be written in less than 48 hours! Wish me luck!

Facade of the Chicago Stock Exchange: The Key to Designer Heaven

2010-12-08T22:22:00.000-08:00

Exerpts from a final paper for an Art History class. Most of the descriptions were left out to spare you readers as well as a whole section of badly argued connections to Islamic artwork. Critique wise I agreed that I talk too much but don't say enough and need to learn to weave in more factual information. Either way I thought sharing my lyrical ridiculousness would be kind of fun ;) But also, pretty pictures!

          Of all the artifacts that the Seattle Art Museum has acquired over the years, none are quite as interesting or underexposed as SAM's Louis Sullivan's 1893 Chicago Stock Exchange Elevator Facade. It went on display in the American Art gallery March 31, 2010 after it was purchased from Sotheby's auction in 2008 from an undisclosed seller for an undisclosed price[1]. It resembles a prop taken straight out of the 1982 science fiction film noir, Blade Runner, in that it holds the same elements of ancient design glazed with modernity . Such a film reference might not crop up in everyone's first impression of Sullivan's design but that sense of mixing of past and future grandeur surely comes to attention. The elements incorporated seem both familiar and alien, archaic yet modern and it's mystery deepens when made known that the artifact was in fact rescued from the rubble of the original Chicago Stock Exchange demolished in 1972 as part of Chicago's Urban renewal project. The facade then becomes the coded message outlining Sullivan's own methodologies and obsessions with design as something higher than just art calling for an absent Rosetta stone. Definitively defining the inner workings of an artist's mind and intention at the moment of creation is of course impossible, but through tracing certain impressions and imagery that appear in the elevator facade a hypothesis of motivation can be developed. From what is presented to the viewer, the numerous allusions made to the divine point to the Chicago Stock Exchange acting as a threshold to modern spirituality that emphasized society's reverence for the accumulation of abstract wealth, a wealth that allowed Sullivan to indulge in his personal glorification of high design.

      When the overall layout of the Sullivan's Elevator covering is taken into account a tentative connection is made with another historically well known entrance design. The facade designed for the Chicago Stock Exchange is completely symmetrical and as stated before sectioned off into rectangular quadrants that frame specifically designed images without allowing cross contaminate from one section to another to occur. This high level of boxy structuring and grandeur, as well as the shared bronze-gold coloring alludes to a connection between the elevator facade and The Gates of Paradise designed by Lorenzo Ghiberti . As a student of architecture and art at the Ecole des Beaux-Arts, it is more than likely that Sullivan encountered Ghiberti's work, especially his infamous gates that are the cornerstone of any European art history curriculum. The Gates of Paradise show ten scenes from the Old Testament and also uses intimidation factors (size, gold wealth, dramatized scenes of Godly acts) in bringing church goers into the mindset of worship when entering the Florence Baptistery. The similar amount of detail, scale of design and use of encapsulating gridded formatting bring about similar feelings of "smallness" in the viewer. Something able to effect even those uninterested in the religious connotations that Sullivan created by unabashedly tying his facade to the religious teachings of the past. In doing so he creates an identical feeling of entering someplace holy through gates that no doubt intend to simulate the indoctrinated image of the "holy gates" otherwise known as the illustrious gates of heaven.

         Take Sullivan's obsession with the circle in these works, a shape we often take for granted because it is so integral to human imagery. "Visual Entropy", or the point of "maximal symmetry, visual and constructional simplicity" has been an obsession for artists, scientists and philosophers for centuries. The Platonian, aka perfect, circle is as un- attainable as God or a let's say, a reliable economy. It's use in the facade points to the designers awareness, if only subconsciously, that the circle is the truest image of the divine and that it will continue to be read as a legitimate part of design for eons to come without the help of recognizable biblical or religious Imagery. It will never grow outdated, unlike the time-specific relief illustrations of The Gates of Paradise, which show telltale signs of their time period. Sullivan's use of the circle as motif render his design as timeless and ideologically transcending of what he saw as the restrictions of modern architecture. In this decision Sullivan finds his own description of the higher power independent of modern material culture and past theological organization that relies on the discovery of timeless imagery at the root of human artistic pursuits.

        In 1896 Sullivan said that "The artistic challenge of the tall office building is to proclaim from its dizzy height, the peaceful evangel of sentiments of beauty, the cult of higher life". Donald Hoffmann responded by asking what the "virtue of a building [is that's] trying to pretend it's something it is not?" Sullivan's gate acts as a threshold for the divide between the mundane unobserving world and the heavenly revelry in technology and human romanticism that the elevator embodies at this time as a new innovation saved only for the powerful wealthy. This divide is contrary to the famous quote "form ever follows function" that Sullivan is so iconically connected with (stated on the Seattle Art Museum description plaque) because instead of building to fulfill a practical requirement he's woven in a very un practical spiritual message that the majority of those viewing and using his design would be uninterested in comprehending. Not only would people be unwilling to decode his elevator but to do so would be to pull away from their worship of money and go back to means of revelry characteristic of an obsolete system of quiet contemplative building patronage. They see the money the building houses, not what the architecture's ornamentation is directly attempting to teach them.

         The facade, echoing The Gates of Paradise is what bars people and allows people to enter a place of either damnation or salvation. Damnation being the world of the commoners stuck in the everyday struggle against the mass of bodies, and salvation the upward mobility of those who can become part of the exclusive club of the educated , privy to secrets and admiration by those further down. This rift can also be characterized as "the artistically enlightened vs. the economically savvy", a struggle Sullivan himself experienced in completely relying on his partner Dankmar Adler to secure such large scale design projects and funding.
        Either way, the doorway itself holds hope for salvation of the perfect world and perfect circle. The facade represents a fork in the road between those acutely aware of the polar hemispheres of knowledge and those unaware and fortunately un-pestered by the realization that everyone is striving for a non-existent utopia, be it a godly, financial one or even a purely visual one. Sullivan exploits this by weaving that hope of someday reaching perfection or "designer's heaven" into the stoic facade through a language that the stock brokers and money managers will unknowingly misunderstand, thus protecting his personal expression of faith. That faith being in the simple beauty of an object and the natural principles it relies on. The faith that there is something truly eternal hidden in the human existence driven by consumption and constant cross exploitation.

Rockstars instead of Homework

2010-12-06T00:07:00.000-08:00

Workin Workin Workin

2010-12-04T01:35:00.000-08:00

Here's a shot of my workspace and a painting thats been in the works for awhile. For the past few months I've been haunted by this icelandic boy (not actually haunted, but pursued by the idea of) and finally a few weeks ago decided he deserved a proper canvas. Again am reverting back to the frontal facing figure but at this point am convinced it's just one of those ingrained personal archetypes that should be developed. Don't worry, that's not all I'm going to be painting, but am no longer going to apologize for this repetition in my work. The small painting has really electrified me to start working larger and be uncarring of the fact that they arn't as seamless and perfect as the current trendy illustrations (which ironically I look up to haha).

On a funner note I have SO MUCH STUFF I want to make and show you guys. Theres an interview I have to write up with a local artist I interviewed, some self loathing autobiographical comics, musical obsessions, offensive character designs, MOAR SMUT etc. If only I had the time and not so many labor intensive finals coming up!

So am really enjoying getting your feedback to the blog questions so today I want to know, in one sentence, what you're currently obsessed with. Personally, I'm bonkers about peppermint flavored things and learning about the female migrant population in China.

Times are A' Changing

2010-11-25T22:00:00.000-08:00

Bits from my sketchbook. Leonard Foujita and his dog.

I've been a little negligent and really should try harder to work and practice this way (sketchbook), away from larger pressure laden projects. But I really dislike sketching people out in the real world. They notice, and then they posture themselves and suddenly my hands don't work properly and I hurry and do an awful job and my back hurts, and my fingers get cold. Something about being in the public sphere as an artist feels very unsafe. Have been thinking of just taking a camera around at all times to steal moments quickly without anyone noticing and then reopening them at home for me to spend time with.

I've noticed though that there's a lot of negative feelings toward artists working primarily from photography or memory. It's probably just a matter of pride and identity, like a woman refusing to take drugs to dim the sharp pangs of childbirth. Obsession with being as strong as previous generations I guess.

So Question to you guys out there: What are your opinions/ thoughts on the growing relationship between photography and traditional art techniques such as painting, printmaking and mixed media?

Also, as you may have noticed the blog is no longer named Tragically Unpopular but instead Not Quite Science. This may change back, but somehow the old title seemed too pessimistic and self deprecating. Maybe a change of title will help cultivate my ego ;)

Gross Ink (warning: Not Work Safe?)

2010-11-19T15:54:00.000-08:00

Just some random ink drawings done while watching televison.

And then there was one

2010-11-12T19:38:00.000-08:00

Materials: Graphite, Gouache, watercolor, photoshop, collage

Finally, something I'm truthfully proud to show you guys! This piece was my first attempt to reconcile my love of drawing and my lack of skill in real life medium. I have a lot of prejudice against computer art (giant art snob actually), and yet I keep being drawn back to it. Thus it's been decided that I should shrug my shoulders and give in to the fact that I'm a participant of a specific time in history and that it should be embraced.

This doesn't mean that I'm giving up on traditional art work, just that I should view digital methods as more than just a shameful crutch. In this image for example I started with a graphite drawing, keeping most of it simple except for the bird which I wanted to completely render so I could try out a different version of layering where I can concentrate on value and then introduce color ontop of it, a basic oil painting technique that I have yet to learn. For a moment it seemed I had ruined everything by haphazardly applying pigment but then found that sometimes in breaking down a mistake you find something new hidden underneath. Once a wall was hit, the image was scanned in and slowly refined in photoshop. Mostly playing with the color levels and contrast to bring out texture.

It's by no means perfect, but so much was learned in the process that it feels like a success.

(p.s Don't want to go too much into the concept, but the Santa Muerte has been on my mind a lot lately.)

It's true

2010-11-06T15:59:00.000-07:00

"It's shamefully romantic to think we exist to see what is unconciously created."

Now Now

2010-11-06T15:55:00.000-07:00

Cold Blush

2010-10-30T13:05:00.000-07:00

Initially meant to be part of the Fashion theme but then it evolved into something different that caters to my obsession of staring women, red cheeked faces and now depictions of women in communist china? No headshots for awhile PROMISE.

The figure was supposed to be sort of model-esque and default elegant but once I started searching for reference I stumbled upon a thread discussing how some Chinese women were having their faces surgically altered to narrow them so that they more closely resembled women from another region... which happens to be the original facial features I wanted to depict...

Unfortunately I can't find the original thread for the life of me. Anyway, it made me sad that the particular woman featured was so pretty before and now nobody will ever see that face ever again. So I used the woman's before face as the model. I wonder how she would feel that she had taken such drastic measures and a complete stranger like me had no interest in her new more "beautiful" face? Tricky Tricky. After reading her story it felt dirty to go with the original plan as if it somehow would be used to make more women feel bad about their faces!

This all really isn't meant to be linked with the illustration at all, it's just fun to share part of the journey.

Question for the day: Do you think artists have a social responsibility when creating?

Love affair in the gauche.

2010-10-20T19:54:00.000-07:00

Sleeping woman

2010-10-15T19:02:00.000-07:00

Cris Brodahl at the Seattle Art Museum

2010-10-09T16:19:00.000-07:00

Today I want to steer your attention to a very talented artist named Cris Brodahl hailing from Belgium, she was just brought to my attention this thursday. Unfortunately her internet presence is very small (not even a website!) so I was unable to locate any of her pieces from the show I saw but these will have to do.

Her first ever US Solo show, Relievo, is being presented at the Seattle Art Museum. Though I often do try to mainly look at the art and not the explanations, one particular sentance sticks in my head. It states that Cris Brodahl has been "quietly" painting for years. The emphasis is on "quietly". Suturing herself within her studio, where only one lone painting hangs, she's been dedicating her life to her images, not the outside world's expectations. This artistic monastary not only blocks out the world but her previous works as well. This purity rings when you see her works. They are clean, calculated and uncomfortably full of madness.

Brodahl pays her respects to classical art by taking her scalpel to it, cutting photos of women apart, cutting them open until their insides in the form of amorphous flowers and knots of finely woven hair tumble out to lay forgotten at your feet.

One could go on about her exquisite painting skills. Though her larger scale figure paintings/ sculptures seemed to be lacking depth, her portraitures of the picture mutants that seemed to be encased in a filmy mask of rock are so full of her obsession for detail, and are so heart wrenching that they make up for their larger counterparts.

Another point that should be noted is though she has been keeping out anything that could sully her work Brodahl is keenly aware of the current art climate. I say this because part of the gallery showcased a series of porcelain sculptures of diaphonous women being lost in a mass of cartilage and bone. This theme carries over to the paintings/ reliefs on an adjacent wall. Upon closer inspection the bony parts of the paintings and the the entirety of sculpture seemed to have been crafted by possibly machine? It was too perfectly cut to be anything hand-made. This use of computers is very ingenious and speaks to the constant pulling sensation in her pieces. Beauty vs. gruesome, artificial vs. traditional.

How convenient these new tools are, but are we selling a little of our souls in the aquisition of these new tools that promise leisure and reproducability? It speaks to something that the current generation is collectively experiencing, especially in the realm of visual culture. What we are seeing is a clash of moving forward and retaining the past, the fear and knowledge that no matter what is done all will not be saved. I was just talking to a friend about this but what we are seeing is an acceleration of technology that is erasing everything from books, movies, cartoons, painting, craftmanship, the real human vs. the idealized version of an avatar or carefully calculated internet persona. The loss of the initial seed is what is feared. I apologize for the sudden downward spiral of this last paragraph but it does illustrate the panic of the handful of people seeing the world move on without them.

Last Observation: What is up with current female artists and the hair obsession? I've done it, classmates have done it, Cris Brodahl is HELLA doin it. Why is hair so important to us? Feel free to comment!